The first time Capricorn Research became aware of football was at the age of 11, during the 1966 World Cup. I know, typical Capricorn late developer, but in my defence at the time I lived in rural North Wales and no one else there had heard of football either.
I naturally assumed that summer’s tournament was par for the course and that England would always win every match that they took part in, even if they had to bribe the refs and linesman to get rid of Argentinian captains and give goals that never were.
Needless to say that assumption wore off fairly quickly and since the mid 70s I have adopted a profound suspicion of anyone attempting to build up national hype before a competition because as so many have said before it’s the hope that kills you.
It wasn’t meant to be like this, after all we invented football. Just look at the chart for England’s first match that proves it.
The Sun is conjunct Mars ( sport ) in Pisces ( the sign of the feet ). You would expect such a chart to give us a good start in international football and so it did. We never lost for 8 years, mind you we were only playing Scotland as no one else had a team.
Incidentally the Sun / Mars conjunction in Pisces occurs in the founding chart of Real Madrid who also took 6 years to lose a first European Cup match.
Madrid’s success however is down to the fact that their Sun /Mars is the apex of a powerful Uranus / Pluto opposition. Also the Spanish giants have their Moon conjunct the victorious and powerful Jupiter rather than the delusional Neptune in England’s case.
But what we do have is the Leo Ascendant. The Ascendant of course rules image and England have always done that well, bellowing out the national anthem and sticking out their chests with the 3 lions on it.
Then we rush off at hectic speed in a classic Moon in Aries style only to be tricked ( Moon conjunct Neptune ) by these cunning foreigners ( in the 9th house ) who soak up our efforts ( Neptune ) and wait until we have run out of steam ( Aries ) and hit us on the counterattack.
We believe ( Neptune ) that we are the best in the world because we invented it ( Moon in Aries ).
In fact the only time we have actually won anything was when the only Uranus / Pluto conjunction since football was invented occurred opposite the England Sun and Mars in 1966.
In fact up until 1950 we refused to take part in the World Cup at all, probably because we thought there was no point, that we’d win it too easily. That year we lost to the part-timers of the USA, a real turning point for the global image of English football, a fact that was reinforced by Pluto being conjunct the Ascendant of England’s chart at the time.
The other thing was Saturn was opposite England’s Sun and Mars during the 1950 tournament.
We’ve had some brave attempts like 1986, when Jupiter was conjunct the Sun and Mars, but even that wasn’t enough to get past Maradona who had Pluto conjunct his Sun at the time. For more info on this one read Diego Maradona – The Hand of Pluto.
The closest we got was 1990, powered by a combination of Gazza and Pluto being trine to England’s Sun / Mars.
The 5-1 victory over Germany in 2001 was again Pluto aided as it was square to the Sun at the time.
In fact 2002 was our best chance with Pluto square the Sun and Mars but Ronaldinho put paid to that.
So what will happen in the Euros this summer ?
Its a well known fact that Michel Platini hates English football and the feeling is mutual, but we should be grateful to the man who could spend much of next year either as President of FIFA or in jail.
Platini’s expansion of the Euros to 24 teams gave England an easy route to qualifying, winning 10 games against mostly countries that noone had ever heard of. It’s also almost impossible to get eliminated in next summers group stages.
So we will get through to the round of 16, where with Jupiter opposite our Sun, we will probably scrape through against someone half decent.
This will be accompanied by mass waving of St George’s flags and tooting of the horns of white vans and everyone will suddenly become convinced that Roy Hodgson’s name is on the trophy.
Then we will get knocked out on penalties in the quarter finals as usual.
Will there ever be an end to this national humiliation ?
The World Cup of 2054 will be held on the planet Venus. Not in the summer months obviously and the stadiums will be covered to avoid all that raining fire.
But Pluto will be in mid Pisces conjunct our Sun and Mars, so England will beat ISIS in the final on penalties.
I will be 99 years old but will surely expire with one word on my lips – Engerlund….