Vicarage Road’s Revolving Door

This has got to be the most boring time in the football season. International breaks are tedious at the best of times, and all we can hope for is that England concede another goal in the first 10 seconds against the mighty San Marino so we can watch the expression on Roy Hodgson’s face to relieve the tedium of it all.

Every year we have to put up with this absurd interruption to the Premier League just as its beginning to get going, but this year we don’t even have the consolation of an exciting return.

Let’s face it, Chelsea have won the league already and all the other English teams are already out of contention in the Champions League too.

The next transfer window is still months away so we can’t even dream of who our clubs will spent their next 100 million on. Of course this doesn’t stop the media lining up all the usual suspects, but it seems to be done in a half hearted fashion as though the journos realise its all pointless.

The only thing that might give us a bit of drama and intrigue is thinking about which manager is the next one in line for the chop.

And even then the obvious choice of Alan Pardew is being ignored by Newcastle owner Mike Ashley simply because he got caught out admitting the obvious after a few drinks and it got in the press so he was forced to retract it.

We’re all addicted to drama these days, some get it from watching Corrie or Strictly, some even from the great British Bake Off, the rest of us depend entirely on football to provide the necessary fix.

But how much can really be derived from debating the merits of Arsene Wenger’s rather pathetic shove on Jose Mourinho or reading about Roy Keane not apologising for stamping on people ?

Capricorn Research was looking forward to the return of Mario Balotelli to these shores to provide a little bit of fun, but he’s been as boring as hell. Why not let him set off fireworks in his bathroom or go around giving all his money to tramps – it obviously makes him play better.

Thank God for Watford Football Club and their ever revolving managerial door, its the only thing that’s providing any intrigue at the moment.

Watford are on their 4th manager this season. The last one, Billy McKinlay was in charge for two games. The one before that Oscar Garcia only actually attended one. And the guy before him Beppe Sannino resigned having just taken them to 2nd in the Championship table against all the pre season expectations.

What on earth is going on ?

Garcia unfortunately had unexpected heart problems which forced him to take a rest from the game, but even so its a all a bit excessive. Nobody knows what’s going on or even more strangely in the football world, whose fault it is. Capricorn Research however, has detected a bit of a pattern.

The Watford owner, Giampaolo Pozzo who also happens to run Udinese in Italy and Granada in Spain, arrived at Vicarage Road a few seasons ago with the great wheeze of thwarting the Football League’s rules around loan players by shipping in a couple of dozen from Italy. It very nearly worked as well as the Hornets were only denied a place in the promised land by an undeserved defeat to Crystal Palace in the play off final.

Pozzo is described as a successful businessman. We have to believe him on this because he has a very close conjunction of the Sun, Jupiter and Uranus in that most material sign Taurus.

The only problem is that he has obviously decided to use himself as an template for success in football management.

The one thing Sannino, Garcia and McKinlay all have in common is that they are all Taureans. They also have their Suns in the early part of the sign, Sannino at 10, Garcia at 6 and McKinlay at 2.

There are no doubt some astrologers that will come up with an explanation for it based on some obscure asteroid or non existent point that is going backwards through one of the fixed signs, but Capricorn Research does work with made up nonsense.

For once there seems to be no astrological reason for these departures unless the Universe has also got bored with it all this season. You’d have to understand it after the dramas of the best World Cup for a generation, so it needs to create something to get its kicks.

Let’s face it the one sign that desperately wants to hold onto the status quo is Taurus. Its all very well relying on Neptune’s transit through Pisces to move managers on. Being Pisceans with a fluid sense of reality to begin with they probably wouldn’t have noticed anyway, certainly with Ian Holloway, Pepe Mel and Ole Gunnar Solksjaer, its hard to actually believe they had the jobs in the first place.

If you’re going to dump someone on their backside, it might as well be someone who will feel it, otherwise where’s the fun. So Taureans it is then, because they are so addicted to stability and in it for the long term, that being booted out after a couple of weeks has got to hurt.

And the Universe had so much fun last season with David Moyes ( Sun 4 degrees Taurus ) that it just couldn’t resist going back for more.

At least with the new guy, Slavisa Jokanovic, Pozzo’s managed to look elsewhere this time and picked a Sun Leo. Quite a sensible choice with Jupiter on the way. Only trouble is he’s got the Sun in square to a Taurus Moon and Saturn is just about to square one and oppose the other.

Capricorn Research is prepared to take the long term view here. I’ll give him till the end of the month.

 

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